I've grown (in) famous for my colorful reviews of fun tourist attractions of all sorts. Museums, zoos, and even alleys of bowling have basked in the glory of my praise, but this place just doesn't cut the mayo coated Wonder and certainly not the mustard.
I went to this overpriced water park where you can pop in dirty clothes and a handful of quarters just to watch it get wet, wild, and take a highly agitated spin. But as for the people who provide the pennies? Forbidden, and strictly so.
Hey, I know I'm not the strongest swimmer, but that shouldn't preclude me from trying my hand and webless feet at the task. I could have bought more gumballs than I could carry, yet I remain dry and all I've got to show for it is some clean clothes. No choking, no tooth decay, and certainly no fun.
I've always heard that if you can't say anything nice you shouldn't say anything at all, but that's not my style and I can't do it. I'm all about bringing the truth like a rain of fire, and the truth is that my skivvies had sudsy fun while I was left to look on with cross-eyed envy.
Even bad publicity is good publicity, so I won't even say which Laundro-Fun-Park suffered me such disappointment, and I certainly won't say how many handsome coins I laid to waste. I'll just say that I'll make sure I'm allowed to climb into the machine before I pop in my hard-acquired silver next go 'round.
Woo, oh boy. Awful spinny in there. Need to stop looking at it and sit down a minute. Upon further consideration I'm not sure how cats endure these rides.
ABOVE: It says it's rated for a super-size load, shouldn't that include me?
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