Up and down just wouldn't be the same without his faithful place in my life drawing me ever closer to the firma of terra, but he really sharpened his game when he taught me that "slide" actually has two meanings.
Gravity is pretty fun for dropping things off the highchair or perhaps the balcony but when it comes to my own experience of falling down or over I'd just as soon do without. I've found a way to slow this "falling down" situation and the result is enough to make even a well-traveled journalist like myself giggle with glee.
The joke is even richer, though, because we all know what a slide is, it's that thing at the park, right? The kicker is that if you get on it and let go Old Man Gravity pulls you down it making you "slide." Get it, you slide on a slide, isn't that funny? It has two meanings.
I found the ride truly electrifying and after a good few passes my hair agreed, while normally static it invariably varied, standing oddly on end. I'm not being negative, I'm just positive I was charged and I'm not sure of the polarity.
What cracks me up more is that gravity made me generate Electro-magnetic force by stripping electrons from the slide by way of breaking the weak nuclear bond. That's three out of the four cosmic forces all set in motion around my butt. Even Stephen Hawkings could find the irony in the situation despite my weak (nuclear) grasp of the subject matter and blatant misuse of "irony."
For those of you who've never slid the mighty slide I demand you polish up your respective booties and frolic directly to the nearest park. Your old friend gravity awaits you with Mr. Newton's book in hand to help every girl and boy scream "yippee" and "wee" in ecstatic defiance of the immobile cruelties of friction.
Man, when did my writing get so decadent?
There are plenty of do's and don'ts in sliding, here we have an example of each.
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