I thought this sort of thing only happened in movies, you know, where you break out your most wicked moves and people clear a circle and just watch you go; but I was wrong, delighted, and spectacular.
So we're strutting down Nanjing Road East, me and my entourage, when I get an itch to show off my latest moves. I was feeling a bit restless and I knew if I didn't do something I'd probably fall asleep, so I asked to get down. And boy did I ever get down!
I call my trademark move "the walking man." It's a bit like "the running man" from the late 1980s except instead of doing it in place and looking like a fruitcake I do it in motion. It's a lot like regular walking except I mix it up Frankenstein-style with my hands held out in front for balance while I move all jerky-like. Imitate if you wish but do not plan to duplicate.
When I was warming up it was no big deal. A couple people saw me and pointed me out to their friends but kept moving along. However, once I got going it became absolutely insane.
Pretty soon (as you can see from the pictures), I was going full-throttle and the circle cleared out. See, at first there were a dozen or so spectators all gathered around to check out my moves. But within minutes there were upwards of sixty people watching! The circle was maybe twenty feet around and was at least three people deep on all sides. In disbelief people were taking pictures with cameras and their camera phones. One guy even cracked out his camcorder to really capture my motion. It was like no one in China had ever seen a white baby strut his moves.
Right about then is when my audience started getting a bit grabby. Some wanted to step in and show their moves, others wanted pictures with me or locks of my hair, and all of them wanted to make the circle smaller.
My handlers felt the show had gone on long enough so we had to make like a baby and head out. I was pretty bummed about it because clearly my public wanted more. I suppose that's the key to success but, forgive me if I'm still id-driven.
Sadly I'm told the Chinese are already hard at work reverse-engineering my moves. It just goes to show there's still some room for improvement on international trademark protection.
Printer Friendly Page
Send to a Friend
