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Breaking News
 The Legend of Brendarello
Thursday, November 13 @ 04:00:00 PST
Once upon a time there was a tiny young man named Brendarello. His family was bitterly jealous of his charm and dashing good looks. He was forced into servitude in his own home yet he remained ever gentle and kind. With every dawn he was hopeful his dreams would someday come true.
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 Roy's Feline Disaster Unraveled
Tuesday, November 04 @ 22:00:00 PST
Roy played nice with his kitty as he had a thousand times before, but that fateful night in Vegas something went terribly wrong. I was determined to find out what made the tigger turn vicious. Plus, cats are pretty.
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 Editor Jr. Seeks Jr. Editor
Sunday, November 02 @ 03:00:00 PST
The job of running Perplexing Times has grown overwhelming. It's always been a push, but now I've got a lot of responsibility. The paper, the support crew, the site, and then also trying to launch my own line of perfume. It just gets to be too much.
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 Skunk Like Me; Candy for Free
Thursday, October 30 @ 20:00:00 PST
I've done my finest reporting via hands-on experience. Nothing can replace it in terms of the often ugly, periodically amazing truths I can uncover. What I learned today is nothing short of both.
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 Hatified Baby Dehats, Rehats Brother
Wednesday, October 29 @ 02:00:00 PST
I wake up chipper, which I'm told is a real asset since most people awaken all grouchy and stuff. I don't even require coffee to make any of my mornings throughout any given day chipper. Not even when I'm awoken and promptly hatified.
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 Ice Age Warning Issued
Friday, October 24 @ 04:00:00 PDT
Earlier today reliable sources reported in shallow depth a general notice of "Ice Age around 4:00pm." This is of course most shocking news that everyone needs to be aware of. So, naturally before warning any of you, I prepared for the worst myself.
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 Meteorologism Tongue Twister, Mind Boggler
Wednesday, October 22 @ 04:00:00 PDT
Brendan Alexander, meteorologist* extraordinaire (in training) here, ready to bring you my world debut weather report. I'm here live on location outdoors.
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 Designer Pillows Making Head Lines
Monday, October 20 @ 02:00:00 PDT
I awoke from a most splendid nap today, when what should I find but a handsome line across my head. I was told these new pillows were up to the challenge, but I clearly had no idea.
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 Technical Problemos El Resolved-o
Friday, October 17 @ 02:32:00 PDT
After days of chaos stemming from a haphazard coffee-in-the-laptop incident, it seems things are finally under control. At least by our standards of control so don't get too excited.
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 Technical Difficulties, Dagnabit, Please Stand By
Tuesday, October 14 @ 21:00:00 PDT
Technical advisors have informed me that somebody allowed me to dump a cup of coffee into the (already hobbled) laptop. I won’t name any names, but no less, please excuse our mess while we correct the problems created.
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